The matrimonial statutes in North Carolina are a complex web of legal rights and entitlements that arise out of the antiquated notion that while you don’t need the court’s permission to get married, you have to have the court’s permission to get un-married.

These days, you have to show the state that you’ve been separated for a year before you can get divorced. Not that long ago, if you wanted to divorce in North Carolina, you had show to a judge that you were entitled to a divorce based on moral grounds. You had to prove that your spouse had been adulterous, for example, or otherwise had “rendered your condition intolerable and your life burdensome.” If you couldn’t prove that your spouse was morally at fault, you couldn’t get divorced.

So, as long as the courts were deciding who could and couldn’t get un-married, they also decided other marital claims, like:

  • property division—called equitable distribution
  • child custody
  • child support
  • post-separation support
  • alimony
  • attorney’s fees

Most people no longer think it’s the state’s business whether someone gets divorced. And while the courts no longer decide whether someone is entitled to a divorce based on moral grounds, litigation tactics are still how most divorce attorneys approach all those other marital claims. The courts and divorce attorneys hold the power to tell you how to divide your stuff during divorce and how to parent after you divorce.

Do you really want the court to decide what’s best for you and your family?

Even when divorce attorneys promise to try to keep you out of court, the court system influences how they try to keep you out of court.

Arbitration, mediation, negotiated settlement… They sound like good ways to stay out of court, but divorce attorneys nearly always bring the adversarial court process into even these alternatives. The expense, drama, and conflict generated by court proceedings inevitably make their way into these alternatives to court.

So how do you avoid going to court for your divorce?

The best way to really stay out of court in a way that avoids the drama and adversarial nature of court proceedings is in collaborative law proceedings. This is the legal alternative to court created by the legislature in 2003 to be the alternative to court. It requires specially trained collaborative attorneys who enter into a collaborative law agreement with you that they will never go to court in your divorce matter.

That’s what makes the collaborative divorce process different. It’s designed to keep you out of court.  Collaborative divorce attorneys actually promise to stay out of court in the contract they sign with you.

So if you want to avoid a courtroom divorce, all the legal fees and pains, then collaborative divorce may be the choice for you.  Springfield Collaborative Divorce is ready to discuss the benefits of the collaborative approach with you today.