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Co-Parenting After Divorce: How to Make it Work for Your Family

Co-parenting after divorce can be a challenge, but it is definitely doable if both parents are willing to put in the effort. In this blog post, we will discuss some tips for making co-parenting work for your family. It is important to remember that every family is different, so you will need to find a system that works best for you. These tips should help get you started!

Put Your Child First

Parents who have a positive, healthy co-parenting relationship acknowledge that their children need both parents. They understand that their kids need to form relationships with both parents and that their kids’ affection for the other parent doesn’t pose any danger to them. Putting your child first will also go a long way toward minimizing conflict.

Open Communication Is Key

One of the most important things to do when co-parenting is to communicate with your ex. This can be difficult, but it is crucial in order to make sure that you are both on the same page. You need to be able to discuss your child’s needs and come up with a parenting plan that works for both of you.

When circumstances demand last-minute adjustments, parents who share a good co-parenting relationship make an effort to discuss with one another first rather than informing their children about the changes. In some cases, it’s beneficial to include rules for handling schedule modifications in the parenting plan.

Be Flexible

Routine is good, but it’s also crucial to be adaptable. As children grow they will become involved in new activities and schedules will change. These changes will require that both parents be flexible and willing to adapt parenting time accordingly.

A positive way to go about things is to be as flexible with your ex as you would want them to be with you. It’s the golden rule. Treat your ex as you want to be treated and they are more likely to return the same courtesy to you.

Aim For Consistency With Rules and Expectations Between Homes

When children are raised by divorced parents, they are frequently exposed to two different households. When each family has its own set of rules, it may cause tension among parents and uncertainty in the children.

It is not surprising that one of the most common issues of conflict between co-parents is inconsistent rules and expectations. It is important to have a discussion with your ex about what you expect from your child and what rules you would like them to follow. Keep in mind that you and your ex may have very different expectations. It’s also critical to explain this concept to your kids. Explain that how they act and behave at one parent’s house would be different from how they act and behave at the other parent’s home. Explain that while both homes may follow similar principles, they must adhere to whichever parent they are residing with.

Once you have come to an agreement, stick to it. This can be difficult, but it is important for the sake of your child.

When you set clear boundaries and behavioral expectations for your children, it reduces the effect of other disruptions in their life. Research has shown that children whose parents have a unified approach to parenting have a better overall psychological well-being. 1

Effective co-parents are aware of how essential their cooperation is to their children’s happiness, success, and well-being. They are willing to work hard to achieve a good working relationship with each other because they acknowledge and value the opportunity for their children to maintain a healthy relationship with both parents. 2

 

References:

1. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/two-takes-depression/201203/the-dos-and-donts-co-parenting-well

2.https://www.verywellfamily.com/signs-of-a-healthy-coparenting-relationship-2997282

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